Keenan Revue. This year’s edition, State of the Revuenion, yielded another tremendous show at the otherwise dreaded Stepan Center, giving students something to look forward to besides the usual rainfall that seeps through the roof during General Chemistry exams. The skits generated laughs with riotous scenes such as President Trump sitting on the toilet and Brian Kelly losing miserably at Jeopardy. If you went to the Revue and are planning to see Fr. Jenkins anytime soon, I wouldn’t recommend mentioning the ideas that his conscience suggested in “Jenkins 2 Jenkins.”
Bookstore Basketball. The largest 5-on-5 tournament in the world is once again upon us, with many students taking advantage of the ongoing interhall season to revitalize their heralded middle school basketball careers. It’s also apparent that the $35 team fee will allow several groups to dress up as their favorite zoo animals. Bottom line: if you’re a basketball fan, try to watch players whose shoes aren’t covered by a penguin onesie.
MLB Opening Day. Within a month, we can finally get over the fact that the Cubs’ drought is over. After all, does anyone still remember that the Cleveland Indians ironically blew a 3-1 lead in the Series? In other news, Tim Tebow is making an appearance with the Mets in spring training. If he can hit a baseball better than he can throw a football beyond 10 yards, then that still doesn’t mean much.
Best Picture. Steve Harvey just cannot get a break. The meme game was back on after La-La Land was mistakenly awarded Best Picture on Sunday. Obviously, the Academy Awards was set on stopping as many hearts as did the end of the movie. Either that or the committee thought for a second that Ryan Gosling was actually a good tap dancer.
Room Picks and Roommates for Next Year. This really shouldn’t be a big deal, but I have known some people to take rooming situations more seriously than the contestants on American Idol during Hollywood Week (when Simon was still around). Current roommates are beginning to walk the tightrope between hurting others’ feelings and getting the best room possible. If it’s any consolation, parietals will probably still be in effect next year.
Nominating Best Teachers. These recent emails seem to always elude my foolproof ND mail filter. Maybe it’s a sign to nominate that professor who really got on your nerves 99 percent of the time, with the 1 percent being the A you got on the final. Or just nominate a teacher that has to teach an 8:20 Moreau class, because bless their souls.
Vincent Buono is a freshman IT Management major who took time away from his procrastination to write this section for the editor-in-chief, who he ran into once around campus. To beg him to visit the library for once, contact Vincent at firstname.lastname@example.org.