Last January, I had recently completed my first semester of college and was about to begin my second semester. I thought that I had formed a well-developed plan for the semester by scheduling an activity or homework problem for myself down to the very last second. In this way, I convinced myself that I could take advantage of every moment of every day.

That’s why my philosophy professor confused me on the first day of class. He imparted to our class that we would read the Republic twice that semester, not only because it was worth it, but also because we college students needed “time to waste.”

Time to waste. I had fallen into a trap set for many college students: we overschedule ourselves because we think that we are invincible and that we can “do it all.” However, we cannot. Indeed, much truth exists in the cliché “quality over quantity.” Ironically, the more activities we pursue, the fewer commitments we can keep. We forget that college is not high school. Many wholesome activities occur on campus, but we cannot devote our time to all of them.

What drives us to participate in countless events and to join at least half of the over 400 clubs on campus? “FOMO,” or Fear Of Missing Out. It plagues every college student. With a campus as lively as Notre Dame, we constantly must choose among events, friend groups, and athletic opportunities. Social media contributes to this epidemic, constantly bombarding us with information. Regret looms before us, and as a result, we stretch ourselves too thin. We have no time to waste.

What I find most challenging is accepting the consequences of my choices. Life, including college life, teaches us that choosing one option necessarily means rejecting other ones. But we must find peace in drawing boundaries. We must learn to say no, especially when it is difficult to do so. Ultimately, a good life does not require that we spend every second doing something, be it studying, playing a sport, or attending a social gathering. Instead, we must dedicate time for others—serving them and entering into close relationships with them.

This summer, I participated in Notre Dame’s Summer Service Learning Program at the site Camp Gonnawannagoagin, a summer camp for children and young adults with autism. My time at camp revolved almost completely around forming and building close relationships. The campers found socializing difficult, and almost all of them possessed very few friends. As a counselor, I encouraged the campers to try new activities, such as singing at a karaoke bar or sliding down an intimidating water slide, but if they adamantly refused, I would sit with them in the back of the karaoke bar or on a pool chair. At that point, I focused on being with them, even though we were losing precious time to pursue enjoyable activities.

My campers at Camp Gonnawannagoagin taught me that I cannot spend all my time doing. Instead, I should focus on living in the present moment. Sometimes I find myself so busy that I forget to live. The campers constantly lived. Their goal was not to move to the next activity but to enjoy and explore the present without concern for the future. In their struggle to form friendships, I learned the meaning of friendship and that it requires time. I experienced the value of presence over activity and the necessity to slow down my life.

As my philosophy professor stated, we need time to waste. We must ignore the expectation set by others to achieve more and to build resumes. We need time to focus on being present with others, without worrying about what follows. We must continue to breathe and accept that at some moment in our day, we should only hear our breath exhale and feel our hearts beat. We must learn to live so that we will have time to waste.

Siena Mantooth is a sophomore living in McGlinn Hall and majoring in chemical engineering. She looks forward to fall break, when she will have the joy of meeting her new baby brother. Contact her at smantoot@nd.edu.