So it comes again. That special time of the year when students flock home from Thanksgiving, rosy-cheeked and full of joy, looking with hope to the arrival of Christmas. Already, present lists are being drawn up, full of ideas for new clothes and the latest trinkets and gizmos. Yet these outward faces of joy hide an inner fear, a fear of what is to come. For these students know in their heart of hearts that there can be no Christmas without finals. Every day that draws them closer to seeing Saint Nick draws them even closer to grappling with the fangs of the dreaded finals. Are you a part of the blissfully ignorant, or part of the knowledgeable scholars? Take our quiz below to find out if your upcoming weeks will be ones of peace and quiet, or horror and dread.
The Questions:
Have you gone to every class this semester? (Yes/No)
Ok, maybe you missed a couple, but most of them at least? (Yes/No)
Have you been to more than 10? (Yes/No)
More than 5? (Yes/No)
Please tell me you have been to at least 1??? (Yes/No)
Does the professor know your name? (Yes/No)
Ok, does he at least get the first letter right? (Yes/No)
Did you major in something where you get to write an essay about your feelings? (Yes/No)
If not about your feelings, at least something subjective like literature or poetry? (Yes/No)
Oh, you are saying you majored in math? The easy math? (Yes/No)
Well, you did that to yourself then, didn’t you? (Yes/No)
Do you have a large group of studious friends who take copious notes, and who would like nothing better than to share those notes with you? (Yes/No)
Do you currently participate in a sport that you will be playing professionally? (Yes/No)
Are you a child prodigy and/or certified genius? (Yes/No)
If you answered no to more than 5 questions, than you better buckle up: your next two weeks will be a living hell. But don’t be too scared. As long as you are nice and not naughty, Santa Claus will still put something good in your stocking.
Declan Feeley is a senior theology and finance double major whose interests include writing and investment theory. Declan can be contacted by email at dfeeley@nd.edu.
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