Women’s Basketball Team wins Nationals: Yeah, the natty champs arrived back in the Bend on Easter Monday, with a warm welcome from The Band of the Fighting Irish. They missed Holy Triduum and ND Lit Choir’s paschal lamb cake heist, but hey, anything for the ring.

More natty champs: The fencing team, clad in their alabaster uniforms, clutched, or rather, scored, their ninth NCAA national title. They can thank their cat-like reflexes for their attainment of the title that now equals the lives of a cat.

Holy Half: For some, it felt like hell to run, but suffering purifies the soul. After all, that’s why it’s called the Holy Half.



Gentrifying the South: Look no further than South Dining Hall, with its consolidation of the salad bars. This is a blatant move to make South look more like North with their bourgeoise accommodations.

Midwest weather: It’s snowing in April and the kids on North Quad are blasting “It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas” outside. Hey, I’m a Midwesterner. I’ve succumbed to this weather.

DART times: What happened to NOVO?