Dear Brenston,

Seven weeks into the semester, I am left with only $120 in FlexPoints. However, I am completely addicted to ABP hazelnut coffee and Subway spicy italian subs. What do I do?

-Desperate from Morrissey

 

Dear Desperate,

Switch to Starbucks? I don’t know, I’m just a dog.

–Brenston

 

Dear Brenston,

My roommate seems to only shower every other week and hasn’t done her laundry yet this semester. She’s even taken to wearing stained clothing to avoid doing laundry. I love her, and I’ve tried to talk to her, but she just won’t listen. Have any advice?

-Disgusted from McGlinn

 

Dear Disgusted,

Wash her yourself? I don’t know, I’m just a dog.

–Brenston

 

Dear Brenston,

I have a professor who wears the exact same blue plaid shirt to every class. He’s only 25 years old. Is this a sign that he’s crazy? Should I drop the class?

-Scared from Lewis

 

Dear Scared,

Don’t worry. Being 25 is not a sign of being crazy–it’s a  normal part of every human’s life–though, of course, I wouldn’t know. I’m just a dog.

–Brenston

 

Dear Brenston,

My friends all say I’m too nice, and that I’ll never be able to negotiate a 7 figure salary. How can I find my inner assertiveness?

–Timid from Flaherty

 

Dear Timid,

Actually, I think that one can live quite comfortably on a just few dollars a month. But I don’t know that much about finances. I’m just a dog.

–Brenston

 

Have any questions for Brenston?? Send ‘em to ndirishrover@gmail.com