Seven weeks into the semester, I am left with only $120 in FlexPoints. However, I am completely addicted to ABP hazelnut coffee and Subway spicy italian subs. What do I do?
-Desperate from Morrissey
Switch to Starbucks? I don’t know, I’m just a dog.
My roommate seems to only shower every other week and hasn’t done her laundry yet this semester. She’s even taken to wearing stained clothing to avoid doing laundry. I love her, and I’ve tried to talk to her, but she just won’t listen. Have any advice?
-Disgusted from McGlinn
Wash her yourself? I don’t know, I’m just a dog.
I have a professor who wears the exact same blue plaid shirt to every class. He’s only 25 years old. Is this a sign that he’s crazy? Should I drop the class?
-Scared from Lewis
Don’t worry. Being 25 is not a sign of being crazy–it’s a normal part of every human’s life–though, of course, I wouldn’t know. I’m just a dog.
My friends all say I’m too nice, and that I’ll never be able to negotiate a 7 figure salary. How can I find my inner assertiveness?
–Timid from Flaherty
Actually, I think that one can live quite comfortably on a just few dollars a month. But I don’t know that much about finances. I’m just a dog.
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