O Scooter, My Scourge
O you ruinous usurpers of a peaceful day’s stroll. You ravenous circling vultures. You flurry of black vampire bats. You…
Notes From A Linkedin Diary
Entry 1: I know many of you have been following my law school journey with bated breath. And if you…
Amazon HQ won’t move into South Bend, Notre Dame to construct 1.5 million square foot office complex “just in case”
The University has already begun construction on three 50-story office buildings
Notre Dame head groundskeeper to resign over allegations of fall foliage color enhancements
In a shocking statement released late Friday afternoon, Nathan Bailey, Head Groundskeeper at the University of Notre Dame, admitted to overseeing the covert transplanting and/or spray-painting of thousands of trees on campus.
NASA’s Insight Mars Explorer lands safely in Hollywood basement
Thanks to Hollywood film nerds, ever-willing to fake scientific progress with a camcorder and a little imagination, NASA has once again exploited the dreams of every young astronaut while simultaneously contributing to the nation’s debt.
Finance major sure to get everything he wants for Christmas except authentic happiness
After spending hours reviewing good and bad deeds from the past year, toymaker and reindeer hobbyist Santa Claus determined that Notre Dame finance major Bryce Ratner was just good enough to get nearly everything on his Christmas list.
Waddick’s tribute band “Rousseau’Shaughnessy” to play show at Legends this week, declines concert royalties
The popular campus indie-folk band “Rousseau’Shaughnessy”, comprised of 11 sophomore English majors living in Dillon Hall, is set to play their first public show at Legends this coming weekend.
Warm Weather Brings New Life to Marxist Infiltration Efforts
“Commie spikeballers” march northwards
Dr. Phil to host live show in stadium over fall break
Noted TV therapist to sing at Notre Dame Stadium
