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Finance major sure to get everything he wants for Christmas except authentic happiness



After spending hours reviewing good and bad deeds from the past year, toymaker and reindeer hobbyist Santa Claus determined that Notre Dame finance major Bryce Ratner was just good enough to get nearly everything on his Christmas list.

“Bryce has done well enough this year,” said Claus late Thursday night out of his North Pole office. “He’s got good grades, good involvement, good internship experience, and a good job lined up for himself after graduation. I can grant him nearly everything that his heart desires.”

Bryce asked for an iPhone, an iPad, an Apple Watch, a Macbook Air, and a $10 gift card to Cici’s Pizza.

“For now, I can promise that Bryce will get all that he seeks,” Claus continued. “However, I cannot give him the most wonderful and beautiful gift of all. Only he can discover this on his own.”

When told that he would get nearly everything that he wished for, Bryce was understandable disappointed.

“He’s getting me just about anything that I ask for,” Bryce said. “If I knew Santa was going to give me an Apple watch, I should have asked for two!”

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